Now that Lost is over, I’m still trying to figure out what that show was actually about. I don’t want to buy all the seasons on DVD. If only there were a place I could borrow the DVDs so I can finally speak intelligently about that damn ending!
You must be living on an island if you don’t know that the library has TV series on DVD that you can borrow for free, so GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY, Jack!
I really want to enter my favorite radio station’s contests, but you have to do it on the computer and I don’t know how to use the mousy thingy or anything. How could I find someone to loan me a computer and show me how it works so I can win my trip to that concert?
You could use a computer and even find someone to show you how to move a mouse and what button to click and where to type your radio station’s name if you would GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
Cindy S, Librarian
If I take my seven year old daughter straight home after school, she battles with me to watch TV instead of homework. I wish there was a cool place with constructive activities we could use to do homework.
Your seven year old daughter could do homework, check out books and participate in great activities if she would just Go The Fuck To The Library.
This Wired™ article had a science article linked, and I want to read it but the publisher’s site says I need a subscription. Single view is $50! How can I read this?
School attendance is almost never required for entry or reading articles online/in the stacks, just checking them out, so GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY!
-Submitted by Nb41
It’s the 5th day since we had that huge East coast snow/rainstorm that I have no power at my house. I wish there were a place that I could go to access the Internet so that I can catch up on every detail of my Facebook friends’ lives, since my iPhone is now dead.
All libraries have Internet stations and wireless connections so you can access all your favorite sites (well, maybe not the dirty ones), so why don’t you GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY?
I need something to keep the kids quiet on long car rides. I dont have a fancy in-car tv, and they don’t play hand held games. They just kick eachother, bicker and I can’t concentrate on my driving.
If you just GO THE FUCK TO YOUR LIBRARY they will be able to offer you a huge selection of kid’s audiobooks, sing-alongs and maybe even a colouring in activity pack. You’ll never know until you go.
I just went to the doctor and he said I have Psoriasis. It sounds like I have a fish disease? I wish I had more time to ask the physician questions so I could learn about this fishy disease?
Well you can find knowledgeable people who can direct you to awesome quality consumer medical websites and books (that will tell you about this skin disease) that won’t try to sell you penis enhancing drugs for your medical condition if you Go The Fuck To The Library!!!
I want to learn another language, but I can’t afford that fancy software, and I don’t know where to get books or magazines that aren’t in English.
You can find software, magazines, and books in many languages, all for free, if only you’d GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Kathy D, library advocate.
I’m looking for and I’ve never had to do this before and I don’t know how to write a resume. I Googled for “how to find a job” but there are so many hits I don’t know what to believe.
You are not the only person in this position, and if you GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY, the helpful librarian can lead you to an entire section of employment-related books and materials, many specific to your geographic area.
-Submitted by Andy L.
My kids have learned to read—in fact they love reading. It’s very exciting. But it seems like everything they read is junk! I really want my kids to be exposed to quality children’s literature. There just doesn’t seem to be enough of it out there. Almost everything at the bookstore is either inane or obnoxious. What can I do?
Why, you can grab a tote bag and your kids and GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY, where there are thousands of easy books and readers hand-selected by picky librarians, better children’s nonfiction than you’ll find at any bookstore, and much more.
I want to read through back editions of Vice magazine (you’ve probably never heard of it), but I can’t buy them any more!
You’ll find both current and back issues of all kinds of magazines if you GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Rick S.
My teacher asked me to do some volunteering with the homeless of our community and write a report about my experiences, but I Googled for a “homeless guy message board”, and there wasn’t a single one! How am I supposed to locate a homeless guy to talk with?
You will find droves of articulate and interested homeless who hold themselves to a presentable level of personal hygiene if you simply GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
-Submitted by Eric G.
It’s so hard to find an activity that the entire family can enjoy. If only there was some place free where adults and children can find something of interest while spending time together as a family.
You’re in luck! You and your whole family should GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Royogini
I’m curious about my family history. My parents, Granny and Gramps won’t talk to me anymore because they’re sick of my questions so I’m expanding my search. I know there are bound family histories, obituaries and census data to look through but I don’t know where to start.
Hey! I bet I can get guidance on genealogy research if I GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
I want to read Snooki’s new book, Confessions of a Guidette, but I’m afraid of being judged for buying it. How can I get access to this great literary masterpiece?
Librarians don’t judge you, and once you return the book, no one will ever know you took it out. Thus, it seems your best option would be to GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
I have an idea about starting my own business so I can quit working for The Man, but I don’t know where I can get business information without asking The Man. Is there anyone who will answer my questions but won’t steal my ideas?
It’s easy to find honest, trustworthy help once you realize that you need to GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Kathy D, library advocate.
I can never decide which book I want, and I hate buying a book and then realizing halfway through that I hate it. I can’t just return it and I’ve wasted money. I wish there were a way I could just borrow a book instead.
You can borrow books and return them if you would just GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
-Submitted by Sarah R.
These economic times are hard. I lost my job and have to learn a new skill, but I’m older now with bills and a family and I can’t afford to go back to college. Where on earth would I find the resources to teach myself a new skill for free?
There are books on everything from computer programming to landscaping, and all you need to do is GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Jason C.
I want to apply for jobs but I don’t know any good sites and the newspapers are only hiring strippers and call girls and those professions are against my delicate nature.
A librarian can help you find good job sites that don’t require you to get naked on the first interview if you GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
-Submitted by Jazmin I.