I can never decide which book I want, and I hate buying a book and then realizing halfway through that I hate it. I can’t just return it and I’ve wasted money. I wish there were a way I could just borrow a book instead.
You can borrow books and return them if you would just GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
-Submitted by Sarah R.
Is there a place I can go to read Infinite Jest without being hounded incessantly by people that want me to buy gluten-free scones, skinny half-caff venti mochas or fair-trade coffees?
You won’t be hassled by anyone if you just GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by mykill (who moved two blocks from a SFPL branch on purpose)
I need something to keep the kids quiet on long car rides. I dont have a fancy in-car tv, and they don’t play hand held games. They just kick eachother, bicker and I can’t concentrate on my driving.
If you just GO THE FUCK TO YOUR LIBRARY they will be able to offer you a huge selection of kid’s audiobooks, sing-alongs and maybe even a colouring in activity pack. You’ll never know until you go.
I want to read through back editions of Vice magazine (you’ve probably never heard of it), but I can’t buy them any more!
You’ll find both current and back issues of all kinds of magazines if you GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Rick S.
I’m a single woman in a new city. I’d like to meet people by volunteering, but I don’t want to work at a free clinic. Where could I go to meet lots of different people in a clean, safe environment and affect their lives in a positive way?
You’d be surprised at how many normal, not-creepy people you can meet if you would just GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
-Submitted by Amy P.
These economic times are hard. I lost my job and have to learn a new skill, but I’m older now with bills and a family and I can’t afford to go back to college. Where on earth would I find the resources to teach myself a new skill for free?
There are books on everything from computer programming to landscaping, and all you need to do is GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Jason C.
I’m really getting into researching my family history, but it’s sometimes hard to find records, and so many websites cost money just to search and you don’t know if the result you get is your ancestor until you pay. I wish there was a place where I could learn about the types of records that are available and have access to some records.
There are books, magazines and databases that will help you start your family tree, locate records, organize your research and more, and all you need to do is GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
-Submitted by Zaelia (Library Technician)
I heard a song by some underground band. They’re not maintstream, so you’ve probably never heard of them. I’m not sure I want to shell out $14.99 on iTunes for an entire album though. If only there was some place I could borrow the CD and listen to it for a while!
You can actually check out and listen to music, if only you’d GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Erin H.
I have an idea about starting my own business so I can quit working for The Man, but I don’t know where I can get business information without asking The Man. Is there anyone who will answer my questions but won’t steal my ideas?
It’s easy to find honest, trustworthy help once you realize that you need to GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Kathy D, library advocate.
I want to apply for jobs but I don’t know any good sites and the newspapers are only hiring strippers and call girls and those professions are against my delicate nature.
A librarian can help you find good job sites that don’t require you to get naked on the first interview if you GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
-Submitted by Jazmin I.
Posted on Freecycle. “I loved the Twilight movies and now want to read all the books. Will someone lend me them? I’ll return them to you when done.”
Erm…if you want to borrow the books to read and then return them you’d be in luck if a place existed specializing in the lending of books. Wouldn’t it be great if such a place existed? And if they let you borrow other things too. Magazines. Movies. Video Games. Music. If only a place like that could be found…..Oh wait. THERE IS! GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY!
It’s so hard to find an activity that the entire family can enjoy. If only there was some place free where adults and children can find something of interest while spending time together as a family.
You’re in luck! You and your whole family should GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Royogini
I just went to the doctor and he said I have Psoriasis. It sounds like I have a fish disease? I wish I had more time to ask the physician questions so I could learn about this fishy disease?
Well you can find knowledgeable people who can direct you to awesome quality consumer medical websites and books (that will tell you about this skin disease) that won’t try to sell you penis enhancing drugs for your medical condition if you Go The Fuck To The Library!!!
This Wired™ article had a science article linked, and I want to read it but the publisher’s site says I need a subscription. Single view is $50! How can I read this?
School attendance is almost never required for entry or reading articles online/in the stacks, just checking them out, so GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY!
-Submitted by Nb41
I’m looking for a book my friend reccommended. Its about cooking and she said its 641.597 SEI. What the hell does that mean?
This is a Dewey Decimal Call number. If you just GTFTTL, and ask for it, they can point you in the right direction very easily. If its not there, you can place a hold (reserve) it and get an email when it arrives.
I’m hosting the family reunion. My sister-in-law eats only vegan gluten-free foods, and my uncle is strictly low-carb. How can I figure out how to feed everyone?
You can spend hours trying to find what you’re looking for on the web, or, there are cookbooks for every kind of diet available for checkout if you’d GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Naomi Y.
I’m the mother of a toddler, and all of these excursions to Chuck E. Cheese™ are getting expensive. If only there were some way to entertain my child for a few hours while I got some work done.
You and your child can participate in “storytime” if you would both just GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Kirby M.
I want to learn another language, but I can’t afford that fancy software, and I don’t know where to get books or magazines that aren’t in English.
You can find software, magazines, and books in many languages, all for free, if only you’d GO THE FUCK TO THE LIBRARY.
- Submitted by Kathy D, library advocate.